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What can we possibly do in the face of the tragic events occurring half a world away?

We can give to the charities like these working on the ground and in neighboring countries to provide relief. We can seek connection, sharing our sorrows, our worries, and perhaps our outrage with loved ones. We can speak out against injustice and stand with those who are being persecuted. All those things feel natural, second nature. And we can quiet and soften ourselves enough to allow it to be.

The Three Tenets of Zen Peacemakers can inform us in how we might honor all that's happening by being with it. 

Last fall, Learning in Action offered a beta 12-week course called Mindful Coach Certification. It was more of an idea than a course.

I made the decision not to craft or plan the course and instead let the course, the students, and the universe decide what it wanted to be and created space for that.

One of the ideas explored in the course (the same idea that shaped it) was “Follow the Energy.” We reflected in the course on how energy wants to flow and the various ways that a client's energy shows up during a coaching session.

As the psychologist Carl Rogers put it “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself, just as I am, then I can change.”

The title "Why We Resist Acceptance" both makes me laugh and gives me pause. I see patterns so often, both in myself and in my clients, that are like chinese finger traps, a kind of unconscious practical joke in which pursuing the very thing we want keeps us from it.

One such pattern I commonly see is resistance to acceptance, a stubborn determination to avoid seeing, realizing, consenting to what is. And we persist in our resistance because we would rather live with our own

Near the end of each year and the beginning of a new one, I take stock of my relationships, the ones I'd like to maintain, the ones I'd like to create, the ones I'd like to improve, patch up and repair. It's this last category that often gives me pause. 

What am I going to do differently? Would my doing something differently even make a difference? Is it even worth trying? What I realize when I read this quote from Jack Kornfield, is that I tend to put all of the responsibility for the relationship onto myself. And I'll tend to believe that if only I could change, everything would be different. And what his words encourage within me is the notion that I can "intend" to reconcile and to hold myself and the other with love and compassion.  

What's Making Me Laugh
So I can fill my joy bucket

My favorite episode so far of Comedies in Cars Getting Coffee is with Michael Richards who played Kramer. It's funny, but more than that, it's human, humane and healing. 

One of my intentions for this year is to spend some time each day laughing. I started over the holidays by watching Jerry Seinfeld's Netflix series, Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee. Most episodes are laugh-out-loud funny (to me anyway), about 20 minutes short, and therefore, snackable. In one of the episodes, Jerry is waved down by a trucker driving a 77-foot long, 18

What's Keeping Me Current
So that I have a better understanding of my client's context 

The number one most-read article in the New York Times in 2021 was by the psychologist, Adam Grant, about the pervasive pandemic experience of languishing.

I've experienced it. Have you? Your clients?

He described it this way: "Languishing is a sense of stagnation and emptiness. It feels as if you’re muddling through your days, looking at your life through a foggy windshield."

It's said that up to 60% of the human body is made up of water. Yet, instead of taking on the qualities of water when we are under stress or in conflict, we are more likely to take on a more rigid stance. We stiffen around our position. We harden our hearts.

Even the martial artist, Bruce Lee, understood the power of fluidity during a struggle. He is famous for saying: "Be like water, my friend."

The author Margaret Atwood explains why adopting the qualities of water is so beneficial: "Water doesn't resist. Water flows."

The extraordinary nature of our ordinary breath is nothing short of profound. Our breath has the power to calm us, to activate us, to connect us with ourselves and with consciousness itself. Supporting our clients in simple breathing techniques may be one of the most useful resourcing techniques we can provide them.

Here’s a guided breathing exercise you can use in your coaching practice.

What I'm Pondering
So I can stay curious
Please Hear What I'm Not Saying
Poetry by Charles C. Finn

Here's what I'm pondering, what's inspiring me and what's keeping me current this week! 

What's Keeping Me Current
 So that I have a better understanding of my client's context 
Each year, Google reviews the search history of the millions of people all over the world and reveals the themes of what the world was searching for. In the 2021 Year in Search, Google shares that the world was searching for healing. Healing from illness, healing from loss, healing from wounds long past. The search history of the world reads like a prayer for hope, resilience, and meaning. It reads like a manifesto on why coaching exists — How do I...

At an intuitive level, we coaches, know that our clients' emotions are an important source of information for them. However, our clients often aren't aware of when they are experiencing their emotions. So, they aren't asking to explore them.

Given that's the case, how can we coaches help our clients uncover something they aren't seeing?

Let's start by looking at what makes this challenging.

How Do We Learn About Emotions?